Am I Dating a Narcissist?

Here are some warning signs that a person you have met or are starting a relationship with may be a Narcissist.

He may blame every error of his, every failure or mishap on other people, or on the world at large.

He may be hypersensitive to ribbing and insults. He may treat children or animals with little thought and respect.

He may be too keen to get more time together and create a fast and furious relationship.

He can immediately cast you in the role of the love of his life and press for exclusivity and instant intimacy. He may text or phone you incessantly, or need to know where you are at all times.

He may not respect your boundaries and privacy, or may ignore your wishes, or want to be included in everything you do.

He may tend to want to control the situation and you compulsively, eg insist you ride in his car, hold on to the car keys, the money, or the theatre tickets. He may disapprove if you are away for too long, and interrogate you when you return. He may insist on a certain way of dressing.

He may act in a patronizing and condescending manner and criticise you often. He may emphasise your smallest faults (devalues you) even as he exaggerates your talents, traits, and skills (idealises you).

He may be wildly unrealistic in his expectations from you, from himself, from the budding relationship, and from life in general.

He may tell you that you make him feel good. Next thing, he may tell you that you make him feel bad, or that you make him feel violent, or that you provoke him.

He adopts a physical posture which implies and exudes an air of superiority, seniority, hidden powers, mysteriousness or amused indifference.

He takes part in social interactions and banter condescendingly, from a position of superiority.

He may ask for special treatment of some kind. Not to wait his turn, to have a longer or a shorter therapeutic session, to talk directly to authority figures (and not to their assistants or secretaries), to be granted special payment terms, to enjoy custom tailored arrangements, and can
frequently and embarrassingly dress down service providers such as waiters or taxi drivers.

He flatters, adores, admires and applauds you in an embarrassingly exaggerated and profuse manner.

In general, he prefers show-off to substance and is shallow. He will not admit to ignorance or to failure in any field.

He may brag incessantly. His speech is peppered with I, my, myself, and mine. He describes himself as intelligent, or rich, or modest, or intuitive, or creative, but always excessively, implausibly, and extraordinarily so.

His history may sound unusually rich and complex. His achievements often seem beyond his age and education. Yet, his actual condition is in reality incompatible with his claims. He name-drops and claims other people’s experiences and accomplishments as his own.

He likes to talk about himself and only about himself. He is not interested in others or what they have to say. He is never reciprocal. He acts disdainful, even angry, if he feels an intrusion on his precious time.

In general, he is very impatient, easily bored, with strong attention deficits, unless and until he is the topic of discussion.

If you ask him about his emotions, he will intellectualise, rationalise, or talk about himself in the third person and in a detached scientific tone.

He may become enraged when required to examine his motives, fears, hopes, wishes, and needs.

He is usually very serious about himself. He may possess a fabulous sense of humour, scathing and cynical, but rarely is he self-deprecating.

If you have found that you are already in a relationship with a Narcissist, and would like relationship counselling, or help in leaving a Narcissist, contact us at the Hart Centre Australia. We have over 50 Psychologists around Australia who have been educated in Narcissism and can knowledgably help you in dealing with your situation. We also offer Skype sessions for overseas clients or those you can’t attend one of our centres. Phone Australia 1300 830 553, or +617 55190004

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Home Solar Power Now Cheaper than Coal

Home Solar Power is now cheaper than Coal By installing Solar Power on your home you now have the capability to generate your own clean electricity cheaper than dirty coal based electricity whilst also doing your bit towards saving the planet.

How Solar Power works:
Solar Panels or photovoltaic panels convert light energy from the sun into direct current electricity. This direct current power is then sent to a box called an inverter that converts this electricity into AC power that can be used within your home or be connected to the public grid for other houses in the area to purchase.

The Price you are currently paying for electricity:
Depending on the state and town you are in and depending on the time of day you use electricity will depend on how much you are charged for it. On average, households can pay between $0.30 and $0.40 per Kilo Watt Hour for electricity during peak hours which are usually between 2pm and 8pm. Costs for shoulder period electricity may be around $0.15 to $0.20 per KwH. .

The Price of Solar Electricity:
As most homeowners buy or lease a Solar Power System rather than actually buy the electricity, the standard mechanism for determining the actual cost of this electricity is done using the LCOE (Levelised Cost of Electricity). This is calculated by taking the upfront cost of the system and dividing it by the amount of KwH’s it will produce over its lifetime. .

Currently a 1.5kW Solar Installation costs around $2,500 fully installed (after available rebates). Over the expected 20 year life of the system, it should produce around 36,000 KwH’s. When dividing the upfront system cost by this number, it equates to an average electricity price of under $0.07 per KwH - a lot less than current electricity charges. As electricity prices significantly increase over time this difference becomes even greater, as the electricity costs from the Solar Power installation remain the same.

To understand your options for getting your home powered with Solar Panels, or to understand more about Commercial Solar Power contact Todae Solar on 1300 GO SOLAR for high quality Solar Power Installations across Australia.

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What is Narcissism?

Have you ever got the sense that your partner thinks he or she is generally superior to you, or more entitled to things than you are? Does he or she find a multitude of ways to devalue you or ignore you? Does he or he try to control you? If so, you may be living with a Narcissist.

Narcissism is considered a spectrum Disorder, which means that there are degrees of manifestation of the characteristics, so a person could have a couple of Narcissistic traits, right through to many or all, which means they would be closer to a Narcissistic Personality Disorder, as defined in the DSMIV.

Generally speaking, Narcissism is a condition of an Inflated False Self, which gives him or her a strong sense of self importance and a grandiose image of himself. He enters into relationships entirely for the purpose of keeping his grandiosity reinforced, as a source of Narcissistic supply for himself. He will idealise those who mirror this for him and devalue anyone as soon as they don’t. There is a real lack of genuine empathy for, or real interest in others, and a massive denial of his own problems, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities.
How did you become a willing victim? Why you?

If you find yourself in a relationship with a Narcissist, at some stage you might wonder why you? What does this say about you, your tolerance for pain and your sanity?
It is true that there is a particular kind of person that finds themself with a Narcissist, at least often well beyond the first indication that there is an underlying nastiness in him.

The type of individual who seems to unwittingly attract a Narcissist is someone who has Borderline characteristics, (which has also been referred to as Co-dependent or compliant) and has a deflated false self.

In Transactional Analysis terms, a Narcissist’s underlying Life position is I’m Ok, You’re Not OK, whereas a Borderline’s underlying Life Position is I’m Not OK, You’re OK.

Interestingly, a Borderline’s profile is less defended that the Narcissist, and less destructive to others, and therefore closer to achieving a healthy relationship, if you can gain true insight into what is happening and what is going wrong in your relationships and be able to develop a stronger identity and boundaries.
Can our relationship be helped?

If both you and your partner are committed to make your relationship a healthy and happy one, then I believe this is worth working on.

Finding a Psychologist who is familiar and experienced with these conditions is important as Narcissism can be notoriously difficult to pick up in a few sessions if the Psychologist is not trained in this. (Education on Narcissism is taught in Psychology courses but does not fully explain the widespread occurrence of this condition, and also the full ramifications of this, particularly to the partner. We at the Hart Centre are committed to ongoing training in these areas and in supporting you in managing yourself and your relationships.)

The success of relationship counselling and marriage counselling depends on many factors, but is largely due to the commitment of both partners to see their patterns and contributions, and be willing to change.

You will often not know how willing you and your partner are to do this until you attempt to do so. You will be able to see for yourselves over 3 to 6 sessions what real effort each of you are putting in to see the problems, own your contributions and make changes.

We can also support you if you have decided to leave your Narcissistic partner, and want help and assistance in rebuilding your life.

The Hart Centre has 54 centres for relationship and marriage counselling around Australia, so you will most probably find one close to you. You will find our Sydney relationship counselling centres in 15 different locations in Sydney, both in the CBD and suburbs. In Adelaide we have relationship and marriage counselling centres in 5 locations across Adelaide. Phone 1300830552 to speak to our friendly receptionists.

For relationship counselling Sydney and marriage counselling Sydney contact the Hart Center. The Hart Center can also help with marriage counselling Adelaide.

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Hay - New South Wales

Located near the impressive Murrumbidgee River in idyllic South Western NSW, the Riverina Shire of Hay has changed from its modest origins in the Gold Rush era to an important agricultural and transportation nexus and popular tourist attraction. Combining natural beauty, historical heritage and essential Australian industry, the Hay Shire includes both the town of Hay as well as the surrounding villages of Booligal, Maude and One Tree. The flat saltbrush plains of Hay are home to some of Australia’s leading wool growing and sheep meat producing areas, as well as cattle properties and many agricultural outputs such as tomatoes and lettuce.

Also around Hay are the Riverine Forest, Grey Box Woodlands and Native Grasslands, home to a substantial amount of famous native fauna, such as Kangaroos and Echidnas. The plains of Hay have provided ideal living conditions for human settlement going back to the Nari Nari Aboriginal community who inhabited the area. White settlement started with the founding of four squatter properties, growing into a community funded by commerce with the stockmen and riverboats who traversed Langs Crossing.

Along with the building of a hotel, post office and courthouse, Hay grew substantially with the famous Cobb and Co making Hay their base of operations for Victoria and the Riverina, including the largest stagecoach workshop outside of Sydney. Growing tenfold in population, Hay was later decimated due to almost every eligible adult male volunteering for service in World War I, of which 1/6 were did not make it back. Hay’s population would later be doubled after the thousands of war prisoners and refugees held in the area during World War II were released and later resettled in Hay. Still a rural agricultural town, Hay embraces and celebrates its history and natural beauty with a number of locations and establishments that cater to tourists and locals alike.

For short term accommodation hay, accommodation hay or holiday home hay, make sure you investigate Murrumbidgee Cottages. Both of our cottages are situated just a short distance from the picturesque Murrumbidgee river and are perfect for families. If you are looking for a holiday home for a couple of days, short term accommodation or even something longer either would be a great fit.

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How does Relationship Therapy Work?

Does relationship counselling work? How about individual therapy for anxiety and depression. Associated Counsellors & Psychologists Sydney, a leading service provider, answers your questions about counselling therapy.

It’s commonly asked by our clients is: ”Does counselling really work?” Like our clients, you could be considering getting some help for a relationship, with an anxiety problem or stress, or maybe low mood or depression. Whatever the reasons causing your concern, the good news is that clinical counselling is proven to help those with common mental health complaints like anxiety and depression. And importantly also, relationship counselling for marriage or couple issues is a validated treatment for assisting couples to improve their relationship.

How does counselling work?
There are numerous different modalities which counsellors are able to use to help you. The therapy they choose will depend on a counsellors training and their judgement of your problems. Treatment for anxiety and depression can include cognitive behavioural therapy. This treatment works by looking into behaviours and thoughts that generally increase your level of anxiety or depression, and help you to overcome this habitual or patterned reaction. For instance, people who experience anxiety may tell themselves things like: 'I won’t be able to make it’, or ’I'll be terribly embarrassed if people see how nervous I am’. Such beliefs are identified together with your therapist, and different, more accurate self-representations are used to challenge these beliefs. With continued practice and perhaps some skills training such as relaxation, great results are experienced by most people.

Can relationship counselling help my partnership?
It’s important to realise that relationships are changeable -they go through phases, from the initial honeymoon stage to the many stages of maturing of the relationships. For most couples, as a relationship matures, so do lifestyle demands and responsibility, be it in the form of increased work pressure or children coming into the family, etc. As these pressures increase, the partners in a relationship are no longer able to accommodate each other’s emotional needs, and conflict can develop - usually into frequent and recurring arguments. Relationship counselling enables each person to learn to soothe their own distress, whilst also learning to identify and name any unspoken needs that are not being satisfied. Partners can learn to begin to negotiate what they can do for each other and which demands may need to go unmet. A new, more realistic life plan is recognised and can be worked with.

What issues can our therapists help with?
Therapists and psychologists are familiar with helping with a wide range of issues including anxiety or stress, depression or sadness, marriage and couple issues, grief and bereavement, addictions, anger management, eating disorders and many other complaints of modern living.

How should I choose a counsellor or psychologist?
Get in touch with a registered counsellor or psychologist for a start to a better life. These licenced mental health professionals are able to work with you to overcome emotional challenges. Whatever country you are in you can seek assistance from the professional body which registers psychologists or counsellors in your state. In Australia, Associated Counsellors & Psychologists Sydney can connect you with a registered therapist near you.

Associated Counsellors & Psychologists Sydney - psychologist services including, cognitive behavior therapy, general counselling, psychology and marriage counselling. Call (02)8205 0566 or visit 418/185 Elizabeth Street, Sydney 2000.

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Blood in Crime Scene Investigation

At the scene of a violent crime, the examining officer will likely find blood and traces of other bodily fluids. These can tell a great deal about what happened, not only about details of how the crime was committed, but also about the people involved.

Nearly everyone knows their basic blood type, and whether it is A, B, AB, or 0, and Rhesus negative or positive. This categorising of blood into types was first made by Austrian physiologist Karl Landsteiner at the end of the 19th century. In his experiments, he took samples of blood and separated the red cells from the liquid, called the serum. He achieved this by spinning the blood at high speed in a centrifuge. Then he took the serum and added red cells from different people. They behaved in two different ways: either the cells mixed with the serum, or they clumped together (clotted), which is called ‘agglutination’.

Many attempts at blood transfusion had been made in the past, but this observation explained for the first time why so many had failed. When introduced blood was not of exactly the same type as that in the body, it resulted in clotting, and the patient died. Tests of blood samples to discover whether agglutination will occur is now made before a transfusion is performed.

DIVIDING BLOOD INTO GROUPS
Red blood cells contain substances called antigens. Antigens help create antibodies which fight infection and disease. Landsteiner suggested that his experiment showed the presence of two specific antigens, which he labeled A and B. The discovery of these antigens caused him to divide human blood into four basic groups:

Group A: antigen A present; antigen B absent
Group B: antigen A absent; antigen B present
Group AB: both antigens A and B present
Group 0: both antigens absent

The particular blood group of each person depends on the genetic inheritance from both parents. Known as ABO typing, it has been used, for example, to help identify the biological father in paternity cases. How common each group is varies from one national population to another. In the United States, for example, the relative proportions of ABO groups are roughly 39 percent A, 13 percent B, 43 percent 0, and 5 percent AB.

In 1927, Landsteiner found two other antigen types, labelling their occurrence as M, N, and MN. In 1940, working in the United States, he and A.S. Wiener discovered the Rhesus factor, named after the Rhesus monkeys they used in their investigations. Since then, other researchers have introduced more than a dozen additional group systems. Different proteins and enzymes associated with specific blood groups have also been identified.

WHAT THIS MEANS FOR FORENSICS
The ability to identify blood type is an excellent means for uncovering crucial evidence in a forensic investigation. If, for example, a victim’s ABO type is O, and bloodstains of this type are found to be on the clothing of a suspect whose type is A, there is a likely probability that they have come from the victim.

Making use of the many other blood typing systems now available, this probability can be greatly increased. If blood of type O occurs in 43% of the population, the substance haptoglobin-2 in 36% of these, and the enzyme PGM-2 in five percent, then the probability of an individual having these three blood types together is 43 x 36 x 5 = 7,740 in one million. In other words, around 8 people in every thousand will have this specific type of blood. It’s still insufficient to obtain a conviction on this evidence alone, but it can help to reduce the number of suspects.

In 1925, another important discovery was made. Around 80% of people are ’secretors’. This means their saliva, urine, perspiration, and semen contain the same substances as their blood, and are able to be used for typing in a similar way. In 1940, two British researchers discovered that it was possible to distinguish between female and male body cells, in particular the white blood cells and those of the lining of the mouth. Blood typing is now so precise that recently one scientist showed that he could distinguish between the blood of his twin daughters, who were genetically identical, because one had experienced chicken pox and the other had not.

SPLASHES OF BLOOD
At the scene of a violent homicidal attack, blood may be present in considerable quantities. Not only will it be on the victim, but also on the weapon and the surroundings. Indoors, the floors, walls, and even the ceilings may be splashed. Careful observation of these bloodstains can provide valuable clues about what took place. Bloodstains and splashes are classified into six basic types.

Round drops are seen on horizontal surfaces; depending on the height from which they fell, they can spray out into a starlike shape. Splashes of blood are shaped like an exclamation mark; they show that blood has flown through the air and hit a surface at an angle. While a victim is still alive, spurts of blood come from the pumping action of the heart. A major artery can spray the blood a considerable distance.

Pools form around the body of a bleeding person. If there is more than one pool, he either dragged himself, or was dragged, from one area to another before dying. Smears are likely also found if this happens. Trails are left when a bloody corpse is moved. There will be drops found if the body was carried, and smears if it was dragged.

If you are looking for a Sydney Criminal Lawyer, contact Go to Court. Our Sydney Criminal Lawyer is here to help. BS14082011SCL

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Fire up the Spit Roast Dad !

spit-roast-hire-sydneyEveryone has their special memory of family barbecues when they were younger, with dad at the helm turning the meat. A spit roast can be described as the ultimate barbecue for an evening of socializing be it with friends or family. This is because the rotisserie serves as a centerpiece for the evening as well as a handy conversation starter. One of the greatest benefits of a spit roast is the ease of use compared to that of a traditional barbecue. No more slaving over a hot grill hoping that the meat is just right. The rotisserie takes care of even heat distribution as well as leaving the “cooks” hands free to actually enjoy the party.The only thing that a chef needs to concentrate on is the basting of the meat and veggies on the spit, one might favour a smokey hickory baste, or maybe a special family recipe. The options are boundless and only limited to ones imagination. Spit roast hire Sydney can help you get your spit roast organised with supplies and advice.

Another great benefit of the Spit roast is the ability to serve any number of people that may be present at the occasion. Did ten extra guests suddenly crash the party? No problem! just slap on another hunk of meat to the rotisserie and you’re sorted! This does not necessarily mean that one needs to cook huge amounts of meat at a time in order have a spit roast. Any number of portions can be catered for, be it two or fifty people.

It’s quite easy to assume that vegetarians would be left out of the equation when talking about a spit roast, this could not be further from the truth. There are various options available for vegetarians which involve placing different vegetables such as aubergines or squashes on the rotisserie. These can be placed right next to the meat so that everyone at the party is catered for with nobody feeling excluded. The presence of a spit roast can truly give a party a greater chance of success.

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Cheap SEO Packages Promo Video from Mister Purple

 


 

Here’s a funny parody video about the SEO industry presented by Mr Purple Cheap SEO packages.

Law firm marketing: Making the most of what you’ve got!

Whether the legal marketing strategy for your law firm revolves around online marketing, niche marketing to particular industries, traditional advertising, or just retaining and growing wallet share of a solid growth of clients, you’ll need to generate content.

Content is an essential dynamic of legal marketing, and without it you might just as well not have a law firm marketing plan. But producing content means hard work, and you need to make the best of the writing you can produce. Here are several ideas to help you use two of the most reliably produced types of legal marketing content as best you can.

Law Firm Marketing - Written material (blogs, email alerts, brochures, guides, information sheets)
If you’ve created any worthwhile, interesting material in any of the types mentioned, you don’t need to only send it off once or print it and leave it to sit in your reception area. You should distribute the content as broadly as possible. For every item of writing you produce, consider:

- Have I sent it to as many, relevant, clients as possible?
- Is it loaded to my website?
- Have I emailed it directly to referrers, associates and other professionals?
- Have I linked it with a post on Facebook and a tweet on Twitter?
- Has it been sent to media contacts?
- Is everyone in my company aware of it and could they explain it in detail if a client has queries about it?
- Can I transform it into a different kind of content and distribute in a different form?

Law Firm Marketing - Presentations
Presentations are generally written with a specific audience in mind, or because of a particular request. As a result they tend to be presented only once then left to stagnate. All of that time involved in preparing it results in only a one time presentation. To get much more out of your presentation consider:

- Who else may I show it to?
- How can I let the greatest number of people know about it?
- Have I mentioned it on our website, Facebook, Twitter, and suggested that I present it to others?
- Is it relevant to send the presentation in hard copy to those who couldn’t attend the seminar?
- Can I record an audio or video of the presentation and distribute it electronically online or directly?
- Is it viable to write an article or blog to discuss questions that arose from the presentation?
- Have I sent additional content to all the people that were at the presentation?

Although these ideas may seem like more work at a time when you’ve probably damaged your monthly billings with the amount of time you spent preparing the first lot of material, it is necessary to remember that it’s much easier to add a small amount of time now to really maximise on what you’ve already produced than it is to produced a whole new piece of legal marketing material.

Maximise the benefits of all the time and effort you put into law firm marketing and you’ll find that the next time you create content you’ll feel more positive about how effective the results will be.

John Gray is a practising lawyer and the Senior Marketer at John Gray Marketing, an Australian specialist law firm and legal marketing consultancy. If you are interested in law marketing, legal marketing and marketing for lawyers, contact John Gray today.

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Relationship Combatibility Factors

Relationship and Marriage counseling can help you discover how in harmony you are.

The two most important factors that decide how similar you are as a couple are:

A similar level of psychological health and maturity and a compatible ranking of Instinctual Variants.

What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the natural energies or drive that are inherently part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.

Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual variant are often with the basic survival needs as they translate into our modern society, for example, finance, food, housing, health, physical safety and comfort.
Being secure and physically comfortable are essential, and they will often bring these supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable chairs, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will enjoy the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of pressing necessities of life.
They are the most introverted of the types.

Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this type have a intense desire for intensity of experience and affection. The blunt riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a room they gravitate toward people they feel magnetized to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often neglecting pressing matters or even basic hygiene if they are infatuated with something that has captivated them. This gives a wide ranging exploratory approach to life, but can also give a lack of focus on one’s own goals.

Social Instinct.
People of this variation are preoccupied on their interactions with others and with the sense of value and self esteem they derive from their participation in collective activities. These include work, family, hobbies and clubs.
Upon entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the power structures and subtle politics between the different people and groups. They are subconsciously attuned on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to touch base with others to feel secure, acknowledged and energised. They seem to live for interacting with others, but they eschew intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.

Within a person, one of these Instincts will predominate. In fact the 3 instincts can be ranked liked the layers of a cake, with the most predominant one at the top. The least powerful one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These instincts play an essential role in our relationships because people of the same type tend to share values to understand each other completely, and therefore feel very compatible.

In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.

For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.

For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.

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